mdlbear: the positively imaginary half of a cubic mandelbrot set (Default)
[personal profile] mdlbear
0922 Tu
  * up 6:18; drugs, nose, teeth; coffee, C
  & cleared path to Colleen's rolling walker, moved stool out of kitchen
  @ http://www.nokiausa.com/find-products/phones/nokia-n900/specifications
    Paul: It will work with T-mobile's 3G network.
    Paul: If you preorder the N900 today, it will cost you $649.00 with free
      shipping and you will also get a FREE nokia Bluetooth headset (BH-703) of
      $89.95 value.  
    You: When will it be available?
    Paul: The N900 will be launched early next month and you can preorder it
      today itself. The sooner you order it, the sooner you will get it. 
    You: Do you know offhand what a T-Mobile subscription costs? And will the
      N900 be available from T-Mobile when it does ship? I may want to wait for
      a subsidized one. 
    Paul: I do not know the cost of T-mobile's plans, but they must be
      similar, not more that those offered by AT&T. The n900 willnot be
      available on a contract from T-mobile, only Nokia 
    You: So I'd have to get a plan from T-mobile, maybe with a cheap phone,
      and move the SIM card into the n900? 
    Paul: You can certainly do that yes
    Paul: Or you can just get a plan from them and they will give you a SIM card
      for the phone 
    Paul: When you plan to buy the phone in the future, just ask for me and I
      will be glad to help you again. Just ask for Paul when you come back on
      the web chat. 
  * make BOA sandwitch for Colleen's breakfast
  * WFH 
    Not much done -- email, yammer, and a little planning
  * Book air travel for OVFF -- leave ~10am? 10/22 - 26 SJC->CMH
    last day to book via Wells Fargo and still have the required 30 days
    united 144/5785: lv. 7:50a, arr: 5:11p
      UA144  (SJC) Thu, Oct 22 2009, 7:50 AM -> (DEN) 11:28 AM
      UA5785 (DEN) Thu, Oct 22 2009, 12:36 PM -> (CMH) 5:11 PM
    United 7573  Operated by: United Express/shuttle America
      Depart: CMH 3:24 PM Arrive: DEN 4:55 PM 	
      United 0723 Depart: DEN 6:50 PM Arrive: SJC 8:34 PM
    (sw 511/635: lv 7:10 AM, arr: 4:25 PM)
    Air travel via Wells has gotten more expensive: extra points if over $300
  & Redo united.com password; they changed things again
  = carry-on info:  9" x 14" x 22" or 45" l+w+h 
    Plink's case is 35x6x10,  (3 or 4 if the outside pocket is empty)
    ... so a little bit big.  Plink herself is 33x8x2.5, so well under 45
    35 / sqrt(2) = 24.748
  & clean-up for Colleen
  & very little done besides a little email; no time for walk.
  ! DO NOT LIKE the way things happen inside my head before I have a chance
    to think about whether I want them to.  I know why it's necessary, I
    just don't have to like it. 
    (Instant reactions like snapping at people when I'm busy.  Emotional
     responses like panic attacks... )
    (N. suggests training myself to pause before speaking; maybe count to 3 or
     take a deep breath.  This will help with the automatic snapping, at
     least.  Thinking about my reaction -- basically mindfulness -- will
     eventually lead to thinking _before_ I react.)
  & Men with chainsaws are attacking the dracena tree next door.  
    ! I'm sad to see it go.  It's also noisy.
  x leave 3:30ish if having to take Colleen to Kaiser
  | have been comfort-eating all afternoon.  That feeling in my stomach is NOT
    hunger, but fear.  Need to stop.
  * 4pm Colleen: Kaiser Campbell (Joyce)
  * 4:15 leave for Kaiser Tantau
  & The tree is gone.  So is the rose bush next to it.  Looks really weird.  
    ! sad to see it go
  & good discussion with Colleen about some of the weekend's issues: fairness,
    inclusion.  She's going to have to develop new ways of coping with her
    feelings; I think getting into the kitchen again is part of that.
  | much less pain in the shoulder than this time yesterday.  Some, though.
  * Colleen is making cookies!  In the kitchen!  On her scooter!
    ! absolutely thrilled
    Betty Crocker gluten-free chocolate chip cookie mix.
    She plans to make dinner one night/week
  & Colleen is walking a little.  So far no more than 1-2 steps unsupported.
  | 9:50 sleepy
  & Dell's about an inch too big for a sidekick bag.
  * 10ish Colleen went to bed
  * laundry, dishes -- sometime during the day
  * bath
  * bed 11ish?; a little Snuggle
  & should have taken cyclobenzaprine

Wow! For a day when not a whole lot happened, I sure seem to have a lot of notes. Of course, a lot of that is a partial transcript of my IM conversation with a sales droid at Nokia, finding out that the shiny new n900 Linux phone is expensive, not subsidized, and works only with T-Mobile.

Another chunk of it is my OVFF air travel itinerary. I'll be getting in around dinnertime on Thursday, and leaving Monday afternoon. I'm doing it on credit-card points, but air travel via Wells Fargo points seems to have gotten a lot more expensive.

I spent a lot of the afternoon comfort-eating for no particularly good reason, and feeling too weird and sad to get much done, while men with noisy chainsaws took out our South-side neighbors' dracena tree. I'm sad to see it go -- it made a good landmark for the house.

I had a good talk with Colleen about some of the issues that came up over the weekend, mostly around her feelings of exclusion when someone comes to visit me and not primarily her. Don't laugh -- we've been married a third of a century, and this only really started coming up a year and a half ago. One of the ways she used to deal with it was to leave the room and go do something else; that's why the fact that she's able to use the kitchen again is such a big deal.

The other bit of deep discussion, this morning with Naomi, involved the fact that I DO NOT LIKE the way things happen inside my head before I have a chance to think about whether I want them to. Instant reactions like snapping at people when I'm busy. Emotional responses like panic attacks. Naomi suggested training myself to pause before speaking; maybe count to 3 or take a deep breath. This will help with the automatic snapping, at least. Thinking about my emotional reactions -- basically mindfulness -- will eventually lead to thinking before I react, even if I have to start out thinking about them in retrospect.

We'll see.

Colleen took a couple of unsupported steps from the commode to the bed again. It's a start. She can make fast progress when she's determined enough -- I recognize that look now.

I should have taken cyclobenzaprine along with my naproxen -- my shoulder was hurting more in the morning.

Date: 2009-09-24 04:35 am (UTC)
shaddyr: Text from Astolat's story, "Touch" (Default)
From: [personal profile] shaddyr
Whee! I'll be at OVFF too, for the first time ever! It'll be nice to see you again!

Hmm. Comfort eating. I know *that* one in a close and personal way.

I DO NOT LIKE the way things happen inside my head before I have a chance to think about whether I want them to.

I grok. I think that Naomi has the right idea on that one. I remember a looong time ago, before I went to years and years of therapy and support groups how I would just react or decide the way things were. I still do it, sad to say, but so much less, and I have the tools to stop, and the ability to think and realize that maybe I am wrong in my head, and to back off, if only for a moment, to get some persepctive.

You'll get there.

Date: 2009-09-24 04:44 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mdlbear.livejournal.com
Yay!! Looking forward to seeing you!

Date: 2009-09-24 12:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jcbemis.livejournal.com
I'll be at OVFF too - it'll be great to see you again.

I like that idea about counting to 3 - I should try to include that too.

Date: 2009-09-24 03:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mdlbear.livejournal.com
It'll be good to see you. Only four weeks! Eeek!

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