mdlbear: (distress)

This last weekend was Conflikt, our local filk convention. GOH was the incomparable Judi Miller; Vixy and Tony were the toast-band, Mark Peters was Interfilk guest, and there was the usual assortment of other guests, including Mary Crowell doing a concert and album release party.

Mark's guest panel was unusual -- he's the sound person for OVFF, so it was a combination talk and live demo. Fun! Judi, in addition to being a simply amazing sign-language interpreter, has a beautiful singing voice as well.

I only sang a few songs: Windward, plus helping Chaos with Filk Inside the Circle (her filk of World Inside the Crystal) Saturday; The Bears and Millennium's Dawn on Sunday while the brunch was going on elsewhere.

Some lovely catching up with people, and I met a couple of new people (Halley and Becca)

I've been stressed all week about the impending move (impending -- that's what doom does, right?) plus the impending (see above) live tests that our project really isn't ready for. Last night was particularly bad; a combination of con drop, frantic sorting, and some highly stressful cleanup. When I finally got to bed I just curled up into a ball for a while. Cat therapy helps some.

Sorting is hard. There are a lot of old memories that I'm having trouble processing, not to mention just plain grieving. Still, there are bright spots. For a while now we've been tossing some items into boxes labeled "Interfilk". There were three of them. It took me an hour and a half to unpack everything and put bid sheets on it; I think we amounted to about a third of the items. *Sigh* a lot of history there. But when something's been in a box for the last five years, or ten, and you haven't missed it, there's really not much point in hanging on to it.

Doesn't keep me from wishing I didn't have to.

Notes & links, as usual )

mdlbear: the positively imaginary half of a cubic mandelbrot set (Default)

Moderately productive week. I am still not entirely confident about the project I'm on at work, but there's a chance we may pull it off. Some work on improving my websites. Some good progress (mostly on Colleen's part) at downsizing the household. Plans for the next year are firming up.

I have decided to retire next year. And many decades of shortsighted and stupid financial decisions mean that we won't be able to keep this house after I stop working. So... downsizing. It's sad, but also liberating: for the first time in years I am not terrified of losing my job. "The realisation that one is to be hanged in the morning concentrates the mind wonderfully," and it was the looming prospect of possibly having to flee a Nazi-occupied country within the next few years that made us decide to do it now rather than later.

Meanwhile, listen to Songs That Help Ease Anxiety, and go read Catherynne M. Valente's The Beasts Who Fought For Fairyland Until the Very End and Further Still --

We must say Yes to the story where, after a long battle, the dark lord is cast down into infinite nothingness or burnt to a crisp or at the very least sent to bed without supper, and everyone cheers and dances and has a party afterward. But most of all, we must say Yes to the truth and the speaking of it. We must say No to silence.

Notes & links, as usual )

mdlbear: (flamethrower)

Today I am not grateful for much of anything besides my family, therapy cats, #safetypin, and the fact that I have not personally seen any of the ugliness going around. Yet.

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