mdlbear: blue fractal bear with text "since 2002" (Default)
mdlbear ([personal profile] mdlbear) wrote2009-07-09 08:56 am
  • Add Memory
  • Share This Entry
  • Current Mood: fuzzy
  • Current Location: Grand Central Starport (o)
Entry tags:

Done yesterday (20090708)

0708 We
  * up 7:20; W=191.4; drugs, nose, teeth; coffee, C
  * make sure laundry gets into the drier
  & YD made bacon.
  & YD called me on leaving a knife out rather than washing it
    ! embarrassed but pleased with her.
  & "containment failure" cleaned up; stayed calm
    ! pleased with myself.  
    | back sore from bending over; took cyclobenzaprine and 2 aspirin
  & Colleen took a shower, standing up, all by herself!
    ! very happy, mudita, proud of her
  . WFH
  * 12:30 Susan
    Told me flatly that my main problem appears to be trying to do too much;
    there is simply no way I can expect to have time for everything I want to
    do, or even a lot of what I "ought" to do.
    ! went in ok; came out very discouraged.  Maybe depressed as well.
    ! grieving, knowing that more sleep means less time for myself.
  * 4:30 must be at work for teleconference
    ! relatively satisfied.  Not all working, but connected and workable.
  & writing in the living room with a conversation going is simply impossible
  * bed ~11pm

A difficult day. The high point, definitely, was Colleen taking a shower, standing up, getting in and out of the tub all by herself. (It's a walk-in tub, but it still means negotiating two steps and some difficult and potentially slippery footing.)

The low point was realizing just how much the combination of caregiving and what appears to be an increased need for sleep will take out of my day. I've been in denial over this for months, I think. But if I intend to keep my full-time job, continue taking care of Colleen, and get 7-8 hours' sleep, and have some time for myself for things like walking, music, and writing, something's going to have to give. Suggestions welcome, especially if they don't involve spending money that I don't have.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only
ext_1844: (kitty hugs by Lanning)

[identity profile] lapislaz.livejournal.com 2009-07-09 04:57 pm (UTC)(link)
Does your insurance cover any kind of in-home caregiver relief? My mom, who's the caregiver for my stepdad (has MS), has a home health aide who comes in once a week to give mom some down time. It's not much, but it helps. Check with them to see if they've got any kind of program.
mdlbear: blue fractal bear with text "since 2002" (Default)

[personal profile] mdlbear 2009-07-10 05:09 am (UTC)(link)
Not as far as I can tell. It covers home nursing and PT visits, but only a limited number.
jenk: Faye (Default)

[personal profile] jenk 2009-07-09 05:15 pm (UTC)(link)
The increased need for sleep may be due to stress - extra effort is being expended just to get through the day. Or it could be part of depression. (Some people sleep more when depressed, others sleep less.)
mdlbear: blue fractal bear with text "since 2002" (Default)

[personal profile] mdlbear 2009-07-10 05:10 am (UTC)(link)
I used to sleep considerably less, and it didn't change much when I went on antidepressants. Beats me.

[identity profile] wyld-dandelyon.livejournal.com 2009-07-09 06:30 pm (UTC)(link)
You do know that the symptoms of exhaustion and of depression are almost identical? You may have been shorting yourself on sleep for years, and not realizing you were "buying" those extra hours by keeping yourself feeling depressed.

However, I will note, I have periodically run myself down being short on sleep; after a couple-three months of getting enough sleep, everything feels better, physical and mental, and the hours needed to be enough cut back a little. And the occasional short night hurts less. For me anyway. Your body may be different, but if you take care of yourself consistently, things should get better.
mdlbear: blue fractal bear with text "since 2002" (Default)

[personal profile] mdlbear 2009-07-10 05:12 am (UTC)(link)
It's been too many years and too many variables changed for me to have any idea which is cause and which is effect now.

But I need to go to bed earlier -- that much is pretty clear.

Talk to the county

[identity profile] capplor.livejournal.com 2009-07-09 07:04 pm (UTC)(link)
find out what resources are available for in home care. There are low cost programs. Ask in-town friends (I would if I could) for something to spell you sometimes. Lots of your friends would be happy for an excuse to stop by & chat -- some light, useful contributions wouldn't be unreasonable. Colleen should be able to do a lot of the scheduling herself. She's awake and alert -- is there a problem with asking for help?
mdlbear: blue fractal bear with text "since 2002" (Default)

Re: Talk to the county

[personal profile] mdlbear 2009-07-10 05:19 am (UTC)(link)
She often has friends in during the day, and someone who we pay a little to run errands. There's nobody we know of who can stay overnight for several days if I need to go on a business trip, for example.

[identity profile] pondside.livejournal.com 2009-07-09 07:22 pm (UTC)(link)
Also -- would it be possible to find a young mother or something that needs somewhere to live and would be willing to exchange care and respite for accommodations?
mdlbear: blue fractal bear with text "since 2002" (Default)

[personal profile] mdlbear 2009-07-10 05:16 am (UTC)(link)
We've thought about that. College student would work better -- we're not really set up for a young kid. A close friend would work even better.
Flat | Top-Level Comments Only