Done yesterday (20090828)

[mdlbear]

0828 Fr
  * up 7:50; W=197.2; drugs, nose; coffee, C
  * 9:00 bring car in for service (leave 8:40ish)
    lube, oilchange, 100K? -> minor service, windows, door handles
    timing belt gets changed at 110K
  * 4:15 Colleen's appointment with Kavanaugh
    ! Colleen very upset: no easy fix.  needs appointment with
      gyneco-urologist to evaluate bladder problems.
  * Walgreen's: briefs; tampons for YD
  * car ready but windows need parts.  Can't be ordered until Tues.
  <- Caught myself saying "I'm sorry" in a context where I could figure out
     that it meant "I'm sorry I can't pay attention to you right now; I need
     to concentrate on what I'm doing."  I.e., an attempt to forestall an
     interrupt.  I must have been dealing with somebody very impatient once.
  <- My habit of repeating short commands multiple times probably came from
     dealing with the kids:  "stopstopstop".
  <- Colleen answers my questions before I finish asking them.  I then have to
     ask again, to make sure that she's answering the question I intended to
     ask or (more often) the question she thought I was going to ask.  She
     gets upset whenever I do this, and also whenever I try to explain it.
  ! unhappy and distressed.  Probably mostly a "contact low"
  & Re-arranged books in bedroom; food now has its own shelf.
    will let me move the rest of the health and travel books from the office.
  | I feel as though I've eaten too much, but I'm still "hungry".
    That probably means there's something I'm not getting enough of.

Mostly a work-from-home day, though I was able to squeeze in a very productive couple of hours at the lab between taking my car in for service and Colleen's follow-up appointment with her surgeon. At the former, I found out that my warranty will save me roughly a grand on repair to the windows, but that the parts aren't in stock. I think maybe I'll leave the car there, since the warranty expires in 500 miles. At the latter, we found that Colleen needs to see a gyneco-urologist to evaluate her bladder problems, which means more delay.

The big breakthrough came on the drive home from Kaiser, when I caught myself saying "I'm sorry" in a context where I could figure out what it meant. It meant "I'm sorry I can't pay attention to you right now; I need to concentrate on what I'm doing." In other words, an attempt to forestall interruptions at a time when they would have been dangerous. Of course, it didn't mean that to Colleen; I'm going to have to come up with a different protocol. Possibly something like "Concentrating now...OK".

I use "I'm sorry" in far too many different contexts. Drives Colleen nuts, and with good reason. More protocol development needed.

I also realized that my habit of repeating short commands multiple times comes from dealing with the kids when they were younger. I'd say "stopstopstop!" for example, starting when I notice a problem and repeating until the kid actually stopped doing it.

I am having a lot of trouble explaining some things to Colleen, and it made for some friction yesterday. One is the idea of making a 90-degree turn while backing up her scooter. I think I may finally have gotten through to her on that one. The other is the reason why I ask questions multiple times. Mostly it happens when I can't usefully interpret the first answer. Often that's because I didn't finish asking the question, so I need to make very sure she understands what I intended to ask. It's stressful. Grump.

Colleen spent most of the evening being understandably unhappy about the lack of a quick fix from her Kaiser appointment, and I ended up feeling unhappy and distressed as well. "Contact low?"

I also noticed that I'd eaten too much, but still felt "hungry" in the sense of wanting to eat. I didn't; I brushed my teeth instead. But it may mean that there's something in my diet that I'm not getting enough of. Just have to figure out what.