(LJ seems to have eaten my first attempt at a reply.)
It's naively believed that bullies behave that way because they are sadists - because they enjoy seeing their victims in pain, crying and begging them to stop. Therefore, if they don't get the "reward" of their victims' reactions, they won't bother any more. There's also a pervasive feeling that it's someohow more "noble" (less "cowardly"?) to suffer in silence and not react at all. Unfortunately, bullies are rarely just simple sadists; it's not their victims' pain they enjoy, it's the feeling of raw power-over. And, of course, if their victims don't respond, they're more likely to increase their attacks, not stop them.
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Date: 2010-04-25 10:13 am (UTC)It's naively believed that bullies behave that way because they are sadists - because they enjoy seeing their victims in pain, crying and begging them to stop. Therefore, if they don't get the "reward" of their victims' reactions, they won't bother any more. There's also a pervasive feeling that it's someohow more "noble" (less "cowardly"?) to suffer in silence and not react at all. Unfortunately, bullies are rarely just simple sadists; it's not their victims' pain they enjoy, it's the feeling of raw power-over. And, of course, if their victims don't respond, they're more likely to increase their attacks, not stop them.