Done Since 2023-12-03

[mdlbear]

It's been a week. It's been a long month this week. And I haven't been getting much sleep. I'll probably put the health details in a later post, although if you're curious you can probably find quite a few in the notes even with the bathroom log redacted. Blarg.

I did, very belatedly, realize that the spasms I'd been attributing to my bladder were from a different thing altogether, and caused by constipation. As are a lot of my urinary difficulties. (But if it hadn't been for that I might not have gotten into treatment when I did, so I'm not complaining. About that part of it.)

I still am not pleased with my body. Parts of it are still working, at least.

It's getting late, and I could probably add to this, but I want to get to bed. TTYL.

Notes & links:
1203Su
  * up 7:05; S=6:14, BP=117/78, P=59, W=192.0; exercises, shower
    % woke up feeling as though I'd wet myself; skin around groin felt damp, but briefs
      didn't.  So can't tell if nocturia or sweat on non-absorbant parts of briefs.
    -> heating pad.  Will take shower later.
    % 07:50 am drugs -> will have to get better about timekeeping.
  % it is possible that my prostate is shrinking already.  -> looking for breakfast
  @ DNA-researcher: It’s not 'woke' to portray prehistoric Europeans with dark skin. It’s
    evolution. " All in all, there is solid evidence to suggest that lighter skin
      tones only evolved in Europe within the last 5,000 years or so, and that people who
      lived in Europe before then typically had darker skin. "
  @ thewayne | Social media/streaming service Plex overshares and shows your friends your
    porn habbits! (ysabetwordsmith)
    Plex Users Fear New Feature Will Leak Porn Habits to Their Friends and Family
  @ Can It Be? Parrots Name Their Children, And Those Names, Like Ours, Stick For Life
  @ What was it like when the last antimatter disappeared? - Big Think
  % prostate problem:  bladder spasms, leakage  -> tl;dr: probably don't need cath now
    -> g" drove me to the ER in Coupeville
       16:56 bladder scan says there's very little there.  So that's good, I think.
       -> good thing I still had a dry Depends in my backpack.
       -> Doctor says if I'd made a false passage there would be lots of blood; there isn't
       -> so basically I've gone from mostly unable to pee, to mostly unable to stop.
       (have not been timing, unfortunately)
       % the drives in both directions were pretty miserable from uncontrolled pissing
    -> got some pads from k, which help.
  @ Kegels for Men - REAL TIME Daily Kegels WORKOUT - YouTube
  % the odd thing is that as of yesterday, I could go 4-5 hours before getting urge to pee
  @ Bladder Training Techniques
    Bladder control: Lifestyle strategies ease problems - Mayo Clinic
  % 21:10 or so, switched to back bedroom (sherman).
    % sleepy and really just wanting to curl up
  @ The Overactive Bladder and Bladder Re-training | nhs.uk
     " Average capacity of the bladder is 300 - 600mls
       Average number of times we pass urine each day is 4 - 8, plus up to once a night if
       under 60 years old and twice per night if over 60 years old. "
     " Fluid intake should be approximately 8 drinks per day (... 1.5 - 2 litres). "
     -> which is a lot less than what I usually drink.  Excluding coffee?
  % 23:00ish 400mg ibuprofen 
  % discouraged and exhausted

1204Mo  * litter boxen
  & awake 6:40ish; S=6:22,
  * up 10:20; S=9:32, W=188.8, BP=125/78, P=73;
  & skipping coffee today in hopes that it will help with bladder irritation
  * 11am phone call from Andrea L Suzuki - Fred Hutch Patient Navigation 206-606-7169
    -> referral to nutritionist
    -> most questions can go to Dr. Sunkara's team if I don't know who to ask
  : 12:26 according to s", k is cramping and will be staying here today.
    -> so I can leave any time I need to.
  : Storage:
    : S. Whidbey Self Storage 360-331-3303
      -> may have a 5x10 available now, few weeks for a 10x10
    : All Island Storage  Freeland 360-331-8624 -> may have a 10x10  Clinton 360-321-9932
      -> unit F282 (freeland) door PIN 5151# (the poundsign is part of it)
      -> N, g" are both emergency contacts and people with access.
      Freeland will call back.  Clinton has larger ones ~10x12 170 1715 e. main
  % 14:25 phenazopyramin 199mg 2 tabs 3/d with or after meals... bladder spasm 1440?
  : callback from Dr. Nyame's nurse Jane - wants me to do UA labs.  Labs for Dr. Sunkara
    should be 4 weeks after the visit on the 27th, which happens to be Christmas, so that
    Friday or Monday.
  & rent storage unit All Island Storage 1715 E. Main, Freelandxs
      -> unit F282 (freeland) door PIN 5151# (the poundsign is part of it)
      -> N, g" are both emergency contacts and people with access.
  * SL:  pads, depends (G)
  % The drive home -- dark, rain, occasional bladder spasms and leaks, was very stressful.
  % N said Tu morning that I had looked terrible when I got home.  I believe it.
  : Ticia needed water and kibble as well as wet food.

1205Tu
  & awake at least twice, 3 leaks.
  * up 6:40ish; S=5:43, BP=130/79, P=93; exercises; Dutch
  * 06:48 am start abiraterone -- no solid food for one hour
  * 08:08 fiber cookies and prunes in lair
  % very constipated this week.
  * prednisone at desk with breakfast
  * just one cup of coffee today (cutting down on caffeine)
  % 10:48 phenazopyramine 199mg 2 tabs (3/d with or after meals...)
  * finish cancerIQ risk survey for Thursday's appointment.  Some of the responses were
    guesses; some misleading because they only accepted numbers.  I shorted the chronic
    conditions; not sure whether it only had space for 2 or I simply spaced them
  @ The Long, Wet Road Back to Normal | Prostate Cancer Foundation (book review:
    They Took My Prostate: Cancer, Loss, Hope. by JP Mac (John P. McCann)
  % I did a set of slow Kegels somewhere around 11:30.  Is not 12:40 without spasm
  x noon Memory Keepers realspace at Federal Way Library Room #1.  skipped due to bladder
  % 12:55 started RT Kegels workout
  % 14:25 sleepy
  % so apparently I was wrong about being able to empty my bladder.  Near as I can tell,
    when I simply relax and piss into a pad, I get a lot more out than when I dash to the
    bathroom.  Blarg.  tl;dr: don't throw the catheters away just yet.
  @ They Took My Prostate: Cancer Loss Hope : Mac, JP  finished -- quick read
    nothing I didn't already know, but short and funny enough not to be a waste of time
  * take 3 docusate, fiber before bed -- if that doesn't work, will use miralax+senna

1206We  * litter boxen
  & awake 5ish; S=4:54;
  * up 7:30; S=6:42, BP=119/71, P=59; exercises
  * 07:45 1g Abiraterone - food permitted 8:45, clear liquids okay, incl. coffee
  @ dragonlady7 | covid [prophylactic measures] (minoanmiss)
  * 10:48 prednisone
  * 12:45pm telehealth appt. with Susanna Myers - integrative medicine
    " Integrative oncology is defined by SIO as “a patient-centered, evidence-informed
      field of cancer care that uses mind and body practices, natural products, and/or
      lifestyle modifications from different traditions alongside conventional cancer
      treatments. "
    -> zoom kept crashing!  ... and couldn't get it to work on the phone either.  -> voice
    2000 IU vitamin D  1500mg Calcium  sardines, kippers, 
    blood test for vitamin D ordered.  Do that tomorrow along with the UA
    referral for acupuncture
  $ pay AX (both cards) from USB; statement balance of 576 to gold;
  $ pay AX platinum full balance of $33 from USB
  $ paid $318 to South Island Pumping for septic inspection from USB
  * 19:10 17g polyethylene glycol + 17.2mg senna
  % I looked at the back of my right hand and noticed that it was an *old person's* hand
  * out to Lair ~9:50
  * load drugs
  & ordered pate and kibble; HR lube from $A for delivery Friday
  % 22:37 sleepy.  Should I cath first?  Unclear.  Probably
  * 23:03 splat

1207Th
  & awake 1am (see above), 3am; 5ish;  wet
  * up 6:30ish; S=6:18, BP=128/78, P=67, W=189; exercises, Dutch
  * 06:57  1g Abiraterone - food permitted 8:00, clear liquids okay, incl. coffee
  * Tums: 300mg Calcium per 750mg smoothie
  * 9am zoom appointment with Lauren A Facchini - genetic counselling
    -> zoom worked fine in the house; used a direct ethernet connection to be sure
    -> blood draw requires a special kit; added to the 1/8 labs at Fred
    -> they just look at 70 or so known cancer genes, but the lab they use does a more
       extensive set for ~$300.
  * 09:46 5mg prednisone
  " QOTD:  me:  My bladder and my rectum are conspiring against me.  I think they're
    winning. "
  % note:  I seem to be using "fudge" as a less emphatic variant of f*ck
  ~ 14:15 pm urine test and blood draw (Meridian has the most parking)
    -* blood draw.  Next time know who ordered what, and which tests.
    -- urine test - total fail.  Lost control of the cup, which fell into the toilet.
       -> also I keep having trouble with getting everything I need set up in the right
          order (mise en place, in culinary French terms)
    -> Naturally I freaked out at that point rather than taking a few deep breaths and
       figuring out how best to deal with it.  Probably didn't wash well enough on the way
       out, so used spray cleaner on Molly's door handle and steering wheel.
    -> also my pants insist on falling down.
    -% and my back hurts
    -> 15:52 400mg ibuprofen
  * need TP, ethernet cable, trash bags  -> packed
  % 17:17 sleepy
    17:40 a mug of hot chocolate won't wake me up, but I don't _need_ waking up -- I need
    soothing.  Rough day.
  * 21:35 heading out to lair momentarily

1208Fr  o litter boxen (E')
  & awake 2ish; 4ish.  wet both times
  * up 6:50ish; S=7:44, BP=134/76 P=65; exercises (~1 set)
  * 07:16 1g abiraterone -- solid food after 8:16;  prednisone ~9am
  @ New systemd update will bring Windows’ infamous Blue Screen of Death to Linux Ars 
  @ Object Personification in Autism (this paper will be very sad if you don't read
    it) (andrewducker)
  : cat food arrived this morning
  * 10:54 a set of kegels while sitting on the toilet.
  @ The AQ-10 | Embrace Autism
    % my score = 10; 80% of people designated Asperger’s syndrome score 6 or higher
  -> phone call about clinical study on exercise ad nuttrition.  Could be useful.
  * call lab about sample -- I'd have to set up a regular appointment.  call 206-520-5000
    -> expect callback from a nurse
  @ Ancient Transylvanian turtle survived the extinction of the dinosaurs | Live Sci
  : odd behavior in FF -- sometimes a tab will go dark and won't close.  At that point
    other things also start going unresponsive as well.  I may have too many tabs open
  : staying at RS over the weekend.  Can go up midweek.  N insists that I spend at least
    two nights at RE, based on how I looked when I got back last weekend.  Can't disagree.
  ! note:  the muscle spasms start automatically, but can be relaxed voluntarily
  @ Listen to Wikipedia [Wikipedia article] (The Verge)
  * laundry -> done 22:00
  * 17g Miralax 19:45.  Not clear I'd want to add senna; I won't, this time.
  @ Defecation - Rectum - Control - TeachMePhysiology
    " a series of reflexes take place that lead to:
      * Relaxation of the external sphincter
      * Contraction of abdominal wall muscles <== THIS
      * Relaxation of pelvic wall muscles "
  @ Fred Hutch patients receiving email threats following recent cyberattack
  @ Seattle cancels plan for privately funded playground at nude beach
  : realized at some point that almost all of my long-sleeved shirts are hanging up
    so I have more variety than I thought, although some are in pretty bad shape

1209Sa
  & awake about every 1-2 hours.  The last time, 7ish, stayed in bed and peed into briefs
    % mouth extremely dry, but there's water in the CPAP humidifier, so...??
    -> raised humidity from 3 to 4.  We'll see if that helps.
  * up 7ish; S=6:42, W=188.8, BP=135/77, P=67; exercises, Dutch
  * 07:34 1g abiraterone -> solid food allowed 8:35
  @ Pluralistic: “If buying isn’t owning, piracy isn’t stealing” (08 Dec 2023) –
    Pluralistic: Daily links from Cory Doctorow (andrewducker)
  * walk: end of block.  Tried to up the pace a little ]
  @ A draft human pangenome reference | Nature human-pangenomics · GitHub
  * 12:01 5mg prednisone
  @ Best Hanukkah Recipes | Saveur
  * lunch:  kippers on whole wheat toast...  fiber cookies (they say up to 3pkgs/day)
  @ Southwest Health | The Link Between Urinary Incontinence and Constipation
  * 18:10 17g polyethylene glycol + 17.2mg senna
  * The Kegel exercises are definitely working.  I've been getting to the bathroom in time
    all afternoon.