2006-10-28
Coolth? No, Warmth.
2006-10-28 12:36 pm(This is loosely inspired by some of the post-OVFF discussion going on in my friends list. I just thought I'd get some of my thoughts -- partly from comments I've made -- collected in one place.)
( First, a little background: I was never one of the cool kids. ) I assume I'm not the only one. In fact, we're all geeks here. blueeyedtigress said it really well in a comment on the post that
started the whole discussion (at least on my friends' list):
Hey, I'm not cool, either. I Am A Geek! A Misfit! A great horrible Weirdo! We outcasts should stick together ... wait, isn't that how fandom started??
We're all so used to being out in the fringe that even among our equally-outcast peers we feel alone. We got that way in the first place by having a hard time meeting people and making friends. Just being in a hotel full of other geeks doesn't make it any easier. In fact, it makes it harder -- nobody else is any good at it, either. It's true that some of us are less geeky than others. But it's hard to tell in specific cases, because sometimes that's just a mask that people put on so nobody will find out how scared they are. Sort of like a hall costume.
I don't have any advice, folks. I'm just another middle-aged geek who learned to play guitar, but never acquired any social skills. If you think I'm cool because I'm up there giving a concert, you're wrong: I'm just there because it's more fun than standing around in the hallway trying to work up the nerve to start a conversation with somebody I don't know. Maybe if I touch someone's heart with a song, they'll come up and talk to me.
I'm not cool, just looking for a little warmth and unsure about how to reach out and find it. Talk to me. I don't remember your name, either -- that's why we wear nametags.