Hippo, birdie, two ewes...

... to the lovely and talented fireskin!!!! Have a great one!!

Done yesterday (20090610)

( raw notes )

It was a pretty good day yesterday: a CD order from a dealer, a good conversation with a friend, a little progress with my current project at work, and a potentially-useful insight.

I got off to a rather late start on my walk, after wasting about an hour browsing musical-equipment sites. I ended up spending my time outdoors (in beautiful walking weather) talking to cflute while standing under a tree on the hill behind our building -- I get the best cell phone signal there. But I was calm, and happy, and glad to be out in the cool, clean air after the morning's light rain. Win.

As for the insight: a lot of my behavior around procrastination, and not making phone calls to friends even though I know I'd probably enjoy the conversation, has been difficult for me to understand. It occurs to me that it sounds a lot like a child doing something bad to get attention, because even being scolded is better than being ignored. Hmm. Could it be that the bad feeling I get from avoiding something and beating myself up about avoiding it is at least a feeling, and a predictable one at that? It's under my control, as opposed to calling a friend, where how I'm going to feel depends on whether they answer the phone. Maybe feeling acutely lonely is worse than feeling vaguely lonely and disgusted with myself? Or it has been in the past? Now, I don't know. It's familiar, at least.

Raising the head of my bed a few degrees seems to help me sleep without my nose getting congested. Yay for that!