See mood.

[mdlbear]

Went out with the chaoswolf to buy her a fireproof file box. Who would have guessed that everyone was closed for Easter? Well, maybe someone who celebrates it... Office Max, Staples, even Fry's was closed.

On the way home I was talking to the Wolfling about changing her name, and its relationship to her impending immigration problems (which are going to be problems no matter which side of the border they end up on), realized that I was out of my depth, and was hit by a massive wave of depression.

I was already feeling a little down because of a number of obvious problems: finances, not getting things done, frustration with software, trouble communicating with Colleen... But I was cheerful when I went out for my walk this morning. What in hell happened?

Colleen advised me to have some lunch, but that doesn't seem to be doing it -- I don't think it's just an energy thing. But I don't know what it is, and that bothers me.

Comments

[braider.livejournal.com]

Separation anxiety?

[mdlbear]

Unlikely. Colleen's having that problem, in spades; I'm just worried that they'll get caught in some cross-border nightmare. When they actually set up a household someplace together I'll be more relieved than anything else.

[catsittingstill.livejournal.com]

Do you normally have ups and downs? Is this one just a bit more exaggerated, or do you have less to do today to distract you from it?

Or is it an issue of chaoswolf moving away? Having a family member leave would make me sad--and it marks a major life shift for you and for her, and those often make people sad.

Plus, has the weather changed? Here it was sunny yesterday and today it's cloudy and cold and that's making me feel a bit blue, now that I think about it.

Maybe it's just the "one more thing" frustration of not being able to help the wolfling with immigration problems?

Whatever it is, I'd like to offer a virtual hug. I'd offer a real one if I could.

[mdlbear]

*hug* thanks.

I've gotten depressed from time to time; usually it's milder and doesn't hit as suddenly. It's often seasonal, but the weather has gotten warm and sunny after a week of cold and rain; I don't think that's it.

The possibility that the Wolfling might not be able to move away when she wants to may have something to do with it. I'm OK with having an extra guest room.

The "one more thing" effect was probably the trigger, but I suspect that this has been building over a couple of months.

[lisa-marli.livejournal.com]

Change of life? Men aren't immune to it, it just hits them differently. Not to mention there have been a lot of changes lately and that old bug of Retirement is starting to hit. Big Harold had problems at that time too.
And it is Real. But just needs to be worked through like anything else in life. And it will hit all of a sudden like that. Out of the Blue - Whack! Life hits you upside the head. Harold would some times scare me when it would happen.
By the by - Since [Bad username or site: @ livejournal.com] is an adult, you should just let her muddle through on her own. Yes, point her to websites, may be help find a lawyer if one is needed, but then back off. She's a married woman now, and has to make those decisions on her own. Now if she asks for help, definitely do what you can. Again mostly research out websites and finding out what you can by talking to immigrants you know. But the decision belongs to her and her husband with lots of love and understand from all the parents involved.
Yeah, I know you are going, I know all that. But knowing and actually letting go are two separate things. Remember the more you let go, the more she grows into the wonderful adult friend you know she can be. And yes, it is Real Hard to Do. Those are our lessons as the parents that we have to learn.
*hugs*

[mdlbear]

She's done a lot of the research; part of it was frustration over not having the answers. Part of it is the anxiety of looking on from the sidelines and not being able to help.

[lisa-marli.livejournal.com]

Been there, done that (see picture of 4 grandsons).
We're the Parents. We are supposed to have All Answers and Give All the Help. Then we can't. Look at it like helping them with their homework, when you don't have clue about the subject. Only this one is a subject called Life. Whack! Again the offered
*hugs*
And the knowledge you are not alone. This is actually a part of letting them go.
Hang in there, Daddy.

[gridlore.livejournal.com]

We tried to drop by BestBuy to get me a holster for my phone. They were closed too. I guess the only advantage for us non-celebrants is that the lines at the grocery store were shorter than usual.

Chaos and her new husband are going to have to sit down and decide who is immigrating where, and how to handle it. This really is something that they have to do themselves.

[mdlbear]

The lines at Long's were short, too.

Since he's closer to having a job than she is, she'll probably be moving North. But you're right; all I can do is make mostly-uninformed suggestions.

[mithriltabby]

That’s right, isn’t this the day that the giant rabbit moves the boulder and Jesus comes out of the hole and if he sees his shadow, we have six more weeks of candy?

[chipuni.livejournal.com]

My best guess is that it will be easier for the Wolf to become a Canadian than for the Ferret to become a U.S. citizen. But that's having done very little research.

And about depression: major life changes, even good ones, can bring them on.

[mdlbear]

That's my guess, too, and it's what I told her.

[mia-mcdavid.livejournal.com]

It can be depressing to realize that much of society is having a celebration and you aren't. No, this doesn't make any sense; nothing is stopping you from having any celebration you want or joining any celebration you choose; it is completely irrational but it's still possible to feel left out.

Particularly when you drove all over town and couldn't buy a fireproof box...

Hugs!

[mdlbear]

I don't usually feel left out; I don't think that was a large part of it, though it might have been a small part.

I'll give you one more free diagnosis

[capplor.livejournal.com]

You're finally "down" from all that wedding/convention anxiety. It takes a while before your gut realizes, "it's all over", and it could well have just hit, uncharacteristically sudden, today.

Re: I'll give you one more free diagnosis

[mdlbear]

Possible, though my feeling after the wedding was more relief than anything else. Anxiety over immigration issues probably a bigger factor.

Re: I'll give you one more free diagnosis

[capplor.livejournal.com]

No, "relief" was your immediate response. "Down" takes a while. It's very common for that kind of thing to be delayed for some period, because first you're just afterglowing and recovering from whatever exciting/stressful event there was.