Done yesterday

[mdlbear]

0319 Th
  * up 6:30; W=186.8; drugs, nose, flonase, coffee, emergen-c
  & See Colleen after taking YD to school
    ! she seems to be doing ok; very calm, mostly just held hands
  * on the way to work:  * gas * bank
  & an unexpected presentation; missed some.  Should read email first.
  & phone call to Callie
    ! happy.  C: "[the phone] didn't attack you this time."  
      me: "I find that it helps to pounce on it first."
      [something about computer games being similar to grand opera?]
      C: ... "You're my favorite geek."  ! delighted
  & work: sign application for $patent
  & hot flash?  Or is it actually hot in here?  -> the latter, apparently.
  & call from Colleen: her Kindle isn't charging with 3rd-party charger
  * Colleen:  1 hr PT; 20 minutes in standing frame
  & brief talk with S. at work about Colleen.  Someone else I can talk to?
  & IM with N: "Don't believe everything you think."
    ! gentle, concerned affection
    *- insight: social phobia preceeded depression
       mdlbear.livejournal.com/1009114.html 
  * bring Colleen the official Kindle charger; the dual one doesn't work
  * she needs protein.  Beef jerky? -> string cheese
  & Mom's birthday cards/presents arrived for YD, us.
  * 20:45ish drugs, nose, flonase
  * bath in Colleen's tub; bed ~11:50

The high point of the day, definitely, was the phone call to Callie. She called me her "favorite geek". *blush* (She told N. about that part, and said that she could hear me blushing all the way from California. I believe it; I wonder whether I could get such a thing from nothing but tone of voice.)

My IM conversation with Naomi wasn't far behind. The main insight of the day, which I've already posted about, was that my social phobia is probably the root cause of my depression. That's both hopeful and depressing: hopeful because now I know something else I need to work on, and depressing because it will be a whole lot harder. Working on the social phobia will require learning new ways of interacting with people, which is, well...

My old self-image is in tatters right now. I guess that's good, but it's the weirdest damned feeling when I stop to think about it.

I love my friends.