mdlbear | River: Colleen: Two Years Later (Reply)

Colleen died two years ago today. Some people say that the second year can be as hard as the first (in different ways). I wouldn't know. I've never been much good at tracking my moods. Also my memory is unreliable. So...

...So I've survived another year without my best friend of fifty years, learning to step around the gaping hole in my life. (That's a metaphor that's come up a couple of times in one of my support groups -- the hole never goes away, you just get better at not falling into it.) On the whole think I'm doing as well as can be expected. Or as well as I can expect, meaning I'm not noticeably more dysthymic than remember being before. See above about moods and memory.

Colleen was the one who kept track of all our friends, and stayed in touch with everyone. Our kids are doing some of that, but I'm mostly out of the loop now. Most of my social life is on Discord and the occasional convention, but it works. I miss going to Sunday brunch with Colleen, and the long drives we often did afterward. Our favorite brunch place, Charmers, succumbed to COVID, but I keep driving past its replacement, and another restaurant that we meant to try but never did. Oh, well. Too late now for a lot of things.

I feel as though I ought to have more to say. Maybe later.