mdlbear: the positively imaginary half of a cubic mandelbrot set (Default)
[personal profile] mdlbear

I'm still not getting much done. The week between Christmas and New Year felt like a vacation, but getting back to work afterwards? Not so much. this article may explain some of that. Though I can't escape the feeling that I'm simply lazy. I've noticed a tendency to get annoyed when Colleen nags me to do something that I've been putting off for too long; I think a large part of that is that these are things that I beat myself up over every damned day.

Most of my current problems are self-inflicted. The few that aren't, I've simply made worse by neglecting them. I don't like myself very much this morning. This week.

On the plus side, Colleen and I celebrated our 43rd anniversary with dinner at Toby's on Friday. And I made a wooden guide to replace the totally inadequate L-hook holding the cat lock in place. And I did a small amount of writing, and an even smaller but still non-zero amount of programming. So there's that.

Notes & links:

  * up 6:15; W=198.2, S=7:16;
    : Dreammapper (CPAP) app is broken.
  @ Troy Hunt: The piracy paradox at Udemy
  @ How TripAdvisor changed travel | News | The Guardian problems with fake reviews
  * ordered a tea mug for C, to arrive Wednesday 0102.
  @ siderea [econ couture class Patreon] The Vimes Boots Theory: Further Reflections
  @ The Post-TV Age? | Linux Journal reviews of streaming video services
  @ Live Stream Your Pets with Linux and YouTube! | Linux Journal
  : It's not clear why I already had a copy of The Positioning Manual, and only in PDF.
    Best guess, because I don't have the mobi and epub versions, is that it was some kind
    of special deal, possibly associated with the SCORE seminar.  Still weird.
  % C nagged me for the second and third time about going for a walk, just as I was
    starting a conversation with N.  Unexpectedly upsetting to both of us.
  * Walk:  Goss Lake and back.  1.6mi
  * Had some gin.  Not sure I can easily tell the difference between 4 and 5 days.  Should
    have been saving samples.
  * Music:  Bells of Norwich (Drop D), Riverheart (very rough at the beginning)
  @ Linux Gets Loud | Linux Journal
    KXStudio audio distro on top of debian or ubuntu
  * worked out the shell script required to extract the URL of the most recent DW post:
    wget -q -O -$(date +%Y/%m/%d/)  \
       | grep 'class="entry-title"' | tail -1                       \
       | sed -E 's/^<[^>]*><[^>]*href="([^"]*)".*$/\1/'
  @ rylnd/shpec: Test your shell scripts!

1231Mo New Year's Eve
  * Up 5:30ish; W=198.2, S=5:53; shower
  * Call Phillips tech support about app 1-800-345-6443
    Tel: 1 (855) 699-6276 (from website)
    -> known problem: data being delayed.  Being worked on.
  ~ Amazon packages supposedly delivered.  Langley PO 3602214113
    -> actually left in the shed. :P
  @ COLOUR AND PATTERN CHARTS (alatefeline + wikipedia)
  * pay V $750 (second half of month)
  * some time sorting mail.  Not going to be enough.
  * C loved the tea mug I gave her (arrived today from $A).  So I won that round, at least
  * 7ish called Mom.
  % L's black bean soup was delicious, but I think I over-ate
  * Music:  When I Go.  The way my throat felt I figured I should stop there.
  * stayed up until midnight.  No celebration.


0101Tu New Year's Day; T' did cat boxes
  * up 5:15; S=4:38;
  : !? apparently ljpost wasn't passing --music to charm!  Fixed, but now I want to go
    back and patch in the whole year's worth.
  * wake C for parade 7:30ish, as usual.  C is watching in bed on her tablet
    I'm listening via headphones with the volume cranked up so I don't have to wear them.
    It works amazingly well.  (Of course, it's needed because for some reason the on-board
    speakers aren't working.  But.)
    -> Tried to use the little USB speaker, but something is broken about that.
    -> persistent problems with the tablet; set C up with Raven instead.
    -> made a cardboard cover so I can leave the laptop open with a cat on it.
  : T' knows someone else she works for who can advise on AirBnB/VRBO.
  @ sources of stress:  comment on kaberett | On the upside, I found the Kenwood ice cream maker
    -> mdlbear | River: Sources of Stress
  * email Ravan with wholesale price of CC+S

  * up 6:40ish; W=198.2, S=7:20;
  ~ wake L ~9am if not up by then
  * go down to Rest Stop.  Do not forget to take the stack of mail  Plan to arrive ~11
    * L wants to go down with me; check with N. => it's okay.
  * help j with math.  Functions.
  @ Everything you should know about certificates and PKI but are too afraid to ask
  * remind YD that she needs to email wedding pix to Mom; share my wedding pix with her
  & high wind warning - took C's suggestion to save some water and do laundry.  The
    cat-litter jar that's been out in the yard is broken, but the one in the entryway
    is okay.  I regret not having saved more.  The one in the linen "closet" is still
    half-full of litter.
0103Th 42nd Anniversary
  * Up 6ish; S=6:32; shower
  : high wind warning.
  * dishes
  : Ticia really wanted me in the bedroom with C.  Then she curled up on the bed.
    The first time she begged for my attention I put out wet food, but when she came back
    I decided to follow her and see what else she wanted.
  : Power out in the garage.  Took a while to figure out because what Molly was telling
    me was ambiguous.
    -> Flipped breakers at both ends -- nothing seems to working.  Hmm.  Maybe should try
       the smaller breakers.  -> turned out to be the GFCI _outlet_ :P  Although it's
       pretty clear that one of the other breakers had tripped as well.
    -> Took the charger up to the shed.
  : saw Cecil.  He hissed at me.
  * dinner out with C. -> Clam chowder at home if we can't get out.  It's windy.
  @ Social Media Sharing Buttons. No JavaScript. No tracking. Super fast and easy.
    Quickly generate social sharing buttons with a tiny performance footprint
    It's a webapp, but you can install it locally.  Only drawback is that it needs to know
    the URL of the page you're sharing, so it requires an edit to use on DW.
  @ Public Domain Day 2019 | Duke University School of Law
  @ List of all Social Sharing URLs for Handy Reference - Social Media Sharing Buttons
    Without JavaScript • Crunchify 
  @ When Companies Question the Value of Design – User Friendly – Medium
    " The people who hire designers and ask them what their value is pretty clearly don’t
      know what designers do, don’t really care, and don’t really want any value they
      might contribute. "
  * Up 3:50; S=4.1;
  * applied at Life360; rejection from Nielsen (expected)
  ! comment by redsixwing on mdlbear | Thankful Thursday made me smile.
  @ Catalog of 122 open-spec Linux hacker boards
  * make sure C checks appointments
  * garage.  Found some pot lids (not the aluminum ones or the adjustable, alas)
    Tried cutting the threshold of the shed with the oscillating cutter.  Useless.
  : Not clear that Cygnus has speakers, but the monitor certainly does.  Guess I didn't
    look closely enough at the I/O panel in back.  Has headphone and line in, so...
  * _finally_ put together a better guide for the cat lock.  1x2 and a bit of bamboo
    flooring.  It'll almost certainly need to have the screws replaced with drywall
    anchors at some point.
  * start leaving ~2:15
  * 3:15 C MAC -> nothing said about insurance, so that particular set of brain weasels
    can shut up now. -> They had trouble getting the pipe to work; apparently something
    clogging it.  ER doctor managed it, so we were able to proceed to dinner.
    * C suggests going out to Toby's after.
    -> excellent fish and chips.  A glass each of Riesling; veggie plate to share.
       The waitress gave us a brownie in honor of our anniversary.
    -> back ~7:45.  Clearly, I can have a drink with dinner if I give it enough time..
  % a lot of itching -- for the last week or two.  wrong laundry detergent on the sheets?

  * up 6ish; W=198.2, S=7:18; shower
  * had a go at  - straightening out the fork on the transport chair, - cutting the
    threshold on the shed, - fixing the power chair.  All without success, though I may
    have made progress on the first and definitely made some (not enough) on the second.
  @ posted mdlbear | Songs for Saturday: Welcome to Acousticville (because psychopomp)
    According to the log it took 6-7 hours, which is slow going.
  : Wind advisory 10pm-10am.  mac powered off, server on UPS, laptops charged, water
    containers full (including the one that had been half-full of cat litter).
  % C blew up at me out of nowhere because I've neglected the greenhouse.  She has a point
    I am, however, angry -- in large part at myself.
  % I think the reason I got angry is that I already beat myself up every damned day about
    the things I've procrastinated.
  & working on a curmudgeon post; got to bed around 1am.

Date: 2019-01-06 10:27 pm (UTC)
mxsupermarinespitfire: Mx Supermarine Spitfire (Default)
From: [personal profile] mxsupermarinespitfire
I'm forcing myself to do stuff every day. Some self-care and well-being, but also things like blogging and learning new stuff. I'm using Todoist to organise myself, mainly because it's cross-platform, and I usually have 5-7 tasks lined up when I get up in the morning.

I've also taken some more radical steps to control my procrastination. I now have Freedom set up to hard-block all social media on my computer every day between 8am and 7pm. That way, I don't have any windows during the day when I can break down and slack off. If I have something to share, it can go into a blog post instead of onto Facebook. I stripped out all but two games from my iPad, and I've turned on the Screen Time blocking feature so I'm not tempted to use it before bedtime.

Date: 2019-01-07 12:52 am (UTC)
alatefeline: Painting of a cat asleep on a book. (Default)
From: [personal profile] alatefeline
Hey there my friend.

I think that you are trying very hard to do things to the point where telling yourself to try even harder makes things worse instead of better. It might be better to try hard on a couple of things; to consciously choose *not* to try hard on a few others, but to either skip them or to set aside some time to do as much or little as feels right; and to sidestep the issue and try to make a couple of others easier to do with positive environmental cues or incentives or moral support. But I know trying to not try harder is scary when there is so much that has to be done. There is no easy fix for this.

Your high stress level is totally justified in any objective, measurable sense as well as in my subjective understanding of your life; and you are a caring and thoughtful person, even when you struggle to accomplish the things you and C want & need. You are loved and you *deserve* that love.

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