See mood

[mdlbear]

Went to Kathy Mar's bash this afternoon -- it was good, and people were very glad to see us and to see Colleen out of the hospital and looking well, but of course being around tasty food was terrible for Colleen. Having to get her home made a good excuse to leave early, which had the side-effect of getting me home before I started to get sleepy. Which is a good thing, too.

We're both somewhat depressed. It's not just the TPN -- the fact that she's missed two holidays, Loscon, our anniversary party, and will be missing Conflikt doesn't help. Nor does the fact that two of our friends died recently, and that January is the anniversary of Cindy McQuillin's death and her mother's.

We both have plenty of reasons to be depressed. That doesn't make it any easier, it just means that happy pills aren't likely to help, even if we were willing to try them. It's the kind of situation where religious people would turn to their deity for solace, and their church for help. We're not. It's the kind of situation where many of our friends would call Colleen to help cheer them up. Um... right.

Yesterday and today were the first walks longer than half an hour I've taken in a week or two. Both times I found myself walking slower than usual; slowing down and stopping a couple of times. I usually do that when I'm depressed. So... I haven't felt up to calling anyone, either. Yes, talking with a friend would probably help. No, I don't want to drag anybody else down. And if somebody cheerful did call me I'd probably just growl at them.

*sigh* Can't win. I'll try making an appointment with a shrink tomorrow. If I can manage to make the phone call.

Don't worry too much about us -- we'll make it. Somehow.

Comments

Checking in... and maybe some walks?

[hvideo.livejournal.com]

I'm hoping that things seem a little less gloomy today. Not looking for a big turnaround, just hoping for a little progress upwards in mood and motivation.

Exercise is generally rated about even with pills and talk therapy in effectiveness in dealing with depression, though like the pills and therapy (and just about anything else to do with depression) it varies from person to person. It can be easier to face than some stranger (often much easier) and has only good connotations in our society. Since you already do walking in the Rose Garden and such it might not be too difficult for you bump this up a notch (barring physical problems). But if you think an exercise partner could help with this, I'm reasonably up for that. (I say "reasonably" because like you I've had some problems with legs and feet, so there is no guarentee that I could keep it up for very long - but I'm certainly willing to give it a try.)

Re: Checking in... and maybe some walks?

[mdlbear]

Thanks; things did look a little better yesterday. I've been having trouble squeezing walks into my schedule; on days when I work from home I'm going to have Colleen kick me out of the house around 11am.